I have heard children use the
term “gay” as an insult toward other children on many occasions, not so much as
name calling but when they are referring towards something they may not like
they will say “that’s so gay”. I do get frustrated when I hear this because for
one thing these children are too young to understand what they are saying so I
know this is something that they hear often enough to know how to use the
saying. These comments can influence all children especially those who are hearing
these comments at home create further misconceptions and stereotypes causing
homophobic tendencies to be included in their own social identities. Like we
have discussed, we learn first from our families and the world around us, so we
also need to counter these misconceptions before they become full blown biases
towards others. When I hear children use terms like this, or any name calling,
I immediately tell them that those are words we do not use in this classroom
like that. I do try to find out where or from whom they heard the words from
and if the child even knows what they are saying. Many times the child does not
even know what they are saying.
My response to someone who
believes that early childhood centers should avoid the inclusion of books depicting
gay or lesbian individuals such as same-sex partnered families would be the
same for someone who does not want their child to discuss religious holidays or
allow their child to celebrate birthdays. I would tell them that I can
appreciate their concern and their views and if they did not want their child
to read the books that is fine, but the books will be here for those who do
want them included. I would also allow them to read the books themselves if
they would like so that they could see what the books are teaching. We need to
be respectful of all the families we serve not just the ones who think their
views are right. I do not stop discussing Christmas, Chanukah, and Kwanza, but
for those families who do not want their children to learn about these different
holidays, their child can go to another room or even stay at home. So if a
parent does not think the books appropriate for their child, I will make sure
their child does not read or look at the book. If we are reading the book in
class I would have the child go to another room.
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Hi Elizabeth,
ReplyDeleteI have heard children tell their teachers that they were called gay. The children calling others gay did it because they were upset about something that happened and wanted to hurt the other child's feelings so I agree that many times the child calling names does not know what they are saying. I agree that books about different family structures should be included in the program. I do think, however, that we must listen respectfully and address fears that other families may have about same-sex families, and explain that reading books and looking at pictures will not make a child become gay. I would also explain that it is important for all children to feel that their family is accepted and respected, and that one way to do this is by including books and pictures of different family structures. Allowing families to see and read the books themselves is a good idea. Perhaps then they would realize that the books do not teach children to be gay, instead they teach them to be tolerant and respectful to all kinds of families. Thanks for sharing!
Hi Elizabeth,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post. I think your response to someone who believes that early childhood centers should avoid the inclusion of books depicting gay or lesbian individuals such as same-sex partnered families is very appropriate. As you have suggested, I have learned that it is important to engage the person in conversation to find out what factors precipitated their prejudiced stance. After listening carefully with an open heart and explaining to that person why including these types of books is so vital to children’s healthy development and future life success to develop comfortable and respectful interactions with all kinds of people, and the person still objects, then it is appropriate for you to take the “bottom line” approach of making sure that their child does not read or look at the book. Thanks for sharing some good information in your post.